Monday, March 2, 2009

Any regrets?

Someone just asked me the other day if I have any regrets in life...and I had to think about it. Now I am done thinking about it, yes, I do have regrets.

  • I regret being a friend to my so-called friends (not meaning stephanie or jill.) Those people who I called my *friends* were not my friends at all and only hung out with me because of my ex. Oh well, they were all trashy.
  • I wish I hung out with another croud in highschool.
  • I regret not letting Sam Woodard touch me & kiss me more during classes, especially movie time :)
  • I regret not telling KENNY PARKS that I had a huge crush on him and I loved our long hugs and kisses we would give eachother in the courtyard, and 2004 pool at Graduation Night. "GRAD NIGHT" We kissed underneith the pool, and infront of some friends! Its making me smile just thinking about it.I do wonder where I would be if I did tell him that I liked him. I still have a crush on him to this day. He is married, but to this day, I still think about him.
  • I regret dating my ex for 6 1/2 years. I knew it wouldn't last when nathan was only a month old. I should have broken up with him then.
  • I regret being friends with my ex's wife.

Then they asked me if I have anything I DO NOT regret, and yep, tons!

  • I do not regret kissing CHRIS LOMAN at all. Even though he is a scum bucket, I don't regret kissing him at all. Especially since "ex" and I were still dating!
  • I do not regret letting JON BANKS fall asleep with me on the bus from "GRAD NIGHT" and on the picknic table.
  • I do not regret flirting with CASEY MILLER when my so-called friends and I hung out at Rainbow Springs and we got into a messy food fight!
  • I regret not letting SAM WOODARD do stuff with me because I was dating "ex" at the time. I should have not stopped him. I should have been a very bad, bad girl! lol
  • I do not regret letting PATRICK COBLE dance with me in the courtyard to our song "I LIKE THE WAY YOU MOVE" every single day.
  • I do not regret SPENCER CONTACT kissing me.
  • I do not regret hugging and kissing KENNY PARKS, especially after giving me his shorts so I could go swimming and kiss him underneith the water. It was our special secret. I miss him so much!
  • I do not regret getting pregnant...just wish the father was someone else!

Now, I know it might sound like I was a w****, but trust me, I wasn't. I didn't cheat on my ex after school. And even though he did cheat on me with KERA, MINDI, LINDSAY, KATIE,MELISSA,GREEN,GIRL AT KICKBOXING, CRISTINA AND GOD ONLY KNOWS WHO ELSE, i pamela did not cheat!

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Here is my new years resolution, in no particular order:
*Buy a car!
*Get my drivers liscense
*Graduate photography college
*Lose at least 30-40lbs!!!
*Meet men, and try not to be so shy.
*Meet other moms, and find some new friends
I need to do some, and then I want to do some.

Christmas was WONDERFUL! I must admit, but this was the best chirstmas I've had in such a long time. I didn't have to put on a pretend smile and go to the "IN-LAWS" christmas PARTY which I will have to admit was a releaf! lol. I love being with my family. In a guy, I need someone that LOVES my family, and I love theirs. I love to be myself and I hate pretending to be someone I am not. I am half polish and half italian...I am a loud, outgoing, funny gal who hates being told to be quiet.
I am stuck when it comes to scrapbooking...ugh! And I don't know what to do about it. I am really a fancy do-er (meaning that I don't have the special tools when it comes to scrapbooking.) but I joined some challenges and I think I could get my juices flowing!
So I chatted with my parents and we all decided it was time to put nathan in daycare so he can interact with kids his own age. He started TODAY! oh my gosh! he looked so cute with his backpack on. I have pictures so I can scrap them!
This daycare has a school program for his age. Its from 7:30-12am, but he's going to that and staying for the whole day. He is going 3 times a week, so I hope this helps him. I am so proud of him. As we left him, he ran to the bigger kids room and played with them. Its going to be a tough day for the workers because he doesn't like kids his own age. The careworker asked me "is this the calm before the storm" and I said yes, because I know my son. lol
But he needs this, he needs to be around children his own age. I don't want to put him into pre-k and not have this experiance! plus I can get to study more for my test coming up. I have an "introduction of photography" test coming up. I'll tell you more about it when I actually take my test. Its exciting to know I will be taking pictures as my career!

2009 Journaling/Blogging Challenge #1

Okay, I had this whole thing writtened out, and then my computer crashed. Ugh!
Yesterday, my son Nathan who is 3 really just irritated me. He destroyed the house, took the both of mine and his sheets off the beds, threw all his toys all over the place, would not stop screaming, and was trying to bite and scratch me, which lead for me to get the soap because he bit me! (Thats the only way he stops biting!) By the end of the day, I was saying outloud "I can't do this anymore!" and by the time he went to bed, I crashed. I was beyond tired!
Sometimes I cannot deal with the stress.

So today, I have been so emotional. He is so much better, but I keep on saying to myself..."its not supposed to be like this!" If you told me this would be my life, I would just laugh...being a single mom is so hard. I get help from my parents yes, but still, its very hard. like right now, he's in my bedroom, sheets are stripped again, and my stuff is all over the place. I just never thought my life would be like this...I never thought that I would be a single parent. But here I am. Sorry, I just need to get my feelings out. No, I do not get any child support, and nathan's father isn't around to be in Nathan's life. He is in Afghan. right now. However, he does not get the HERO award, when he hasn't called his son in a month and a half, and didn't even call his own son on his birthday!

Anyways, I've met a girl off of WWW.CAFEMOM.COM and she is really sweet. Nathan and her son get along well. We are going to the parade, and to a snowpatch! It doesn't snow in florida at all, so, they are going to (make) snow!! I am so excited! lol
Oh, that DATE that I had...he hasn't called me since the gator's football team won. Oh well, I guess it wasn't ment to be...but thats okay. I know what I am looking for.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

2009 Journaling/Blogging Challenge:

Hello and welcome to my "2009 Journaling/Blogging Challenge" blog!
My name is Pamela, I am 23 years old.
I am a single parent to a beautiful boy who is 3.
I will write here 2/3 times a week telling you about how my life has gone.
I will tell you about the "horriable" dates I've been on if I go out on any.
I will show you pictures I have taken.
I will tell you funny things on this journal, including what my son learns!

Thank you so much for reading!